Can You Hear a Heart With No Beat?
by InspireRebelLoveTravelLiveKnow
Summary: I was- no I AM- undoubtedly, indisputably, insanely in love with him. That's only a problem for one reason. He- Alfred's a werewolf… and I'm a vampire. US/Can- OneSided Fran/Can
1. Bloodlust

I was- no I AM- undoubtedly, indisputably, insanely in love with him. That's only a problem for one reason. He- Alfred's a werewolf… and I'm a vampire.

No, I don't sparkle. Don't even go there. Those Cullen's are frauds! Trying to be vampires. We ALL know that you're fairies. Don't doubt that.

No, I don't have a special eye color. Only when I thirst for blood. When I'm hunting. That's when I met him. On the coast of the Outer Banks. I wasn't going to hunt in my own territory. What's the fun in that? So, I decided that I would take a trip to the United States of America. What fun!

Lucky for me, I was granted invisibility when I was changed. I wasn't dying. It was out of lust that I was changed. Francis went to far in drinking. I turned vampire. Arthur nearly had Francis' head. That was quite a show. But sometimes, I had to get away from them. And so now, I was lying on the sand, letting myself suck in the moonlight. I turned most of my senses off, so when something jerked me up from my spot in the sand, I nearly killed it on the spot. Then I noticed its eyes.

He looked at me intently, sharp blue eyes looking into my violet ones. He let out a low growl as my senses came back to me. I inhaled and one word hit my brain. _Mutt._ I looked again at the boy. he was toned. His button up shirt was opened to reveal his chest and abdomen, and he looked nice. "I recommend you stay out of our territory." He growled. I raised an eyebrow. He was telling me what to do? Oh, this guy was sooo in for it.

"I recommend you unhand me." I replied with a smirk. This only made his grip tighten around my shirt. His scowl grew, and he let out a throaty growl. It just seemed to make him hotter. I threw him a shit-eating grin and he lifted a hand, bringing it hard against my cheek.

"We don't need any leeches in our territory." I sneered at the nickname. Who did they think they were, comparing us to those slimy…things? It was gross! Those filthy mutts… how I hated them… I quickly brought my fisted hand up, slamming into his chin.

"You will not call me a leech, you filthy mutt." I said with venom in my voice. I could tell he was happy with my reaction. He wanted a fight. _He… he provoked me!_ Oh, shit was about to get real serious. I turned invisible and he let go, gasping that his prey had been released. I quickly was behind him and tackled him to the ground, taking one of his ears in my hand and slamming his head into the sand. "Shit just got serious, eh?" I said, allowing my accent to slip.

"I guess it did… _Matthew._" I could hear the grin on his face. He knew who I was. Oh maple…

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><p>Please R&amp;R<p> 


	2. Silver Bullet

"I guess it did… _Matthew._" I could hear the grin on his face. He knew who I was. Oh maple…

"How do you know who I am?" I nearly yelled, digging my knee hard into his back, earning a pained whimper. I could tell by the way he moved his head to the side that he was getting sand in his mouth, but hell, since when did I care? "Tell me now, before I bite you." I growled through clenched teeth, digging my knee even deeper into his back.

"a-ah! That huuuuurts!" he groaned out childishly, as I dug my knee straight into his spine. "I'll never- OW!- tell you! The hero- OW!- never lets the villain win!" he shrieked, causing me to take a fistful of his hand and slam his head into the sand. Hell, I've had enough of this shit. This guy was going to hell tonight.

"TELL ME YOUR NAME, DAMMIT!" I yelled, getting no answer, just a muffled 'Never!' in return. This was going to be one long night. I was still invisible, lucky me, when I heard more footsteps, the scent of werewolf overcoming me. I stood, seeing three come down onto the beach. The tallest spoke first.

"JONES! Why are you lying on the ground and why do I smell vampire?" the tall one asked, his Russian accent coming through heavily. The smaller man nodded, adding a long string of words in Chinese (or that's what I suppose it was?) ending in 'aru.'

I made a run for it, but a hand quickly grabbed my arm, tossing me to the ground. A large mutt stood above me, his blue eyes piercing, contrasting with his light blonde fur. "you made a mistake by coming during a full moon, ja?" he stated, and suddenly I could feel my invisibility cease. The others came to stand around me as well, the offending from before pulling me to my feet once more.

"Ivan, Yao, Ludwig. This is my ex-lover, Matthew." He stated, the shit-eating grin returned to his face. _EX-LOVER? I was NOT a LOVER to this FILTHY mutt! No way in hell! _"I hope you treat him as he deserves to be treated." He said, slamming me down on the ground again. I looked up at him, suddenly my past rushing back to me.

5 years prior

"Al, I can't do this anymore…" I said, rubbing my neck. How was I supposed to tell him?

"are you…?" he asked blankly, and I ran. Ran from the person I knew I loved, to the person who would treat me correctly, I ran straight into the arms of Francis Bonnefoy.

Back to now…

Alfred stood above me, saying quietly to his friends, "go. I need to speak to him alone." They left, making him promise to come back. He agreed. It was a few minutes, us staring at each other. "I still love you matt…" he stated, hand shooting into his pocket, he pulled out a small gun. I watched as he changed back into his man form, and pointed the gun straight at my chest. I looked up at him blankly.

"If you love me… you wont shoot." I stated simply, knowing that the bullet he had, it was the silver bullet that he had made when he first learned about vampires. The silver bullet that had once been meant to protect my life, but now was meant for my death. The bullet that he had carved a heart in, with both of our initials. He bit his lip, obviously thinking about what I had just stated.

"Mattie…if you hadn't left…" he started, obviously about to go into 'we wouldn't be in this situation, you would still have a soul.' But I interrupted him.

"I would've been forgotten, mistreated, and neglected even further. Alfred, I did this for my own good. For my own mental sanity." I said, my voice becoming a low whisper. But I knew his mutt ears could hear me perfectly. I knew that he was going to try to understand. My Alfie was in there somewhere. He sighed, taking the bullet out of the gun.

"I love you…" he said quietly, dropping the bullet onto my chest and collapsing next to me, in tears. I picked up the bullet, turning to face him.

"I love you too…"

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><p>Please R&amp;R<p> 


	3. Shared Pain

"I love you," he said quietly, dropping the bullet onto my chest and collapsing next to me, in tears. I picked up the bullet, turning to face him.

"I love you too…"

Why had it taken me so long to realize… to realize this? I was thinking it all over when **RING! RING! RING! **I pulled out my phone. "Hello?" "**MATTHEW WILLIAMS! WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU? WE'VE SEARCHED THE WHOLE TERRITORY!" **Arthur screamed into the phone. I cringed. "I'll be home later tonight." **"YOU BETTER BE OR I WILL…"** I hung up there. I didn't need to hear what his plans for my murder were. I looked Alfred in the eye. "I have to go," he whimpered. I could tell he wanted this, us lying on the beach in love- to last forever. But it wouldn't work that way. Vampires and werewolves are meant to kill each other. Unless the werewolf chose the vampire as their master, but that was suicide… we all know he would only be used once, for feeding, then be killed. It was just the way things worked out. I sighed, kissing him lightly on the forehead. His scent wafted up into my nose, making me want to rip my nose straight off. I quickly turned on invisibility and stood, waiting a second as my wings came out of my body. I heard a few cracks, and then reached over to stroke one of the feathery wings. I shook a bit and took off, looking behind me at my adorable- yet confused- true love.

When I arrived back, the whole team tackled me; I could see in their eyes that they knew I had been around mutts. Francis scowled. "_Mon ami_, why do you smell like _le chien_?" he asked, his nose scrunched up. He flipped his hair a bit, stating, "Before you speak, go and shower. And get out of those clothes, its FREEZING out here!" I quickly got up onto my feet and made my way for the bathroom, hearing music in the conservatory, which I knew had to be Roderich…I smiled, knowing that he had the same problem as I. His love- Gilbert- had also been turned into a werewolf. I never really understood what he went through but I guess I do now. I sent him a sympathetic smile and he nodded, going back to his piece. He was an intense pianist… I would have to talk to him after I was done.

When I finally didn't smell like dog anymore, I was sitting on the couch in one of the lounges, the one with the huge window that overlooked the forest. It was beautiful, and I liked to just stare out, looking at the scene. But I couldn't get my mind off of Alfred. His eyes, his voice, him. He still loved me, and I was surprised to say that I still loved him. I heard footsteps but ignored them, that is until Roderich came and sat next to me.

"Is he a werewolf?" he asked quietly, looking down at his fingers. His skin was slightly paler than mine, I was out more, and I took trips down to see Miguel in Cuba. He preferred to stay here and practice his music. I nodded, not noticing the tears that had been flowing down my cheeks all the while. I clutched the white stuffed bear that Alfred had given me for my birthday, all those years ago. I always had it when I was upset. It was the scent of it. I was never able to remember… what exactly that scent was. Turns out… it was Alfred, before he turned… whoever turned such an innocent person really must belong in hell. I mean, he never met anyone harm. He always wanted to be the hero. He would go out of his way for things to be right and just. Nothing would stop him. He was perfect. I reached inside my pocket and my fingers tightened around the bullet that I had slipped into my pocket. I ran my thumb over the heart, tracing Alfred's initials slowly. Roderich leaned over and wiped a tear off my cheek, and whispered, "You'll be fine… I promise."

Only hell knew if that was true…

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><p>Please R&amp;R<p> 


	4. Love Sucks

Only hell knew if that was true…

I sat with Roderich, both of us staying silent, studying the forest from the window. The full moon shone, only making me think of the brightness in Alfred's beautiful blue eyes. Even if they were threatening, I couldn't help to love them. I recalled the day's events.

_"I RECOMMEND YOU STAY OUT OF OUR TERRITORY."_

_"I GUESS IT IS…MATTHEW."_

_"TELL ME HOW YOU KNOW ME!"_

_"MY EX-LOVER"_

_"I LOVE YOU…"_

_"I HAVE TO GO…"_

_"WHY DO YOU SMELL LIKE LE CHIEN?"_

_"YOU'LL BE FINE…I PROMISE."_

I sighed. Maybe… maybe I did the right thing by leaving. Maybe that love Alfred and I shared, the love that Roderich and Gilbert shared… maybe it was meant to be broken. Maybe this love was never to work out in the first place. Maybe it was forbidden for a reason. A sudden crash drew me from my thoughts.

"AYE! YOU'LL NEVER BEAT BLOODY C'PTAIN KIRKLAND!" Arthur yelled, obviously drunk.

"NON! I WILL!" I heard, then the sound of clattering. I ran around the corner of the hall to see Francis and Arthur standing on the table, swords in hand. Roderich was watching intently, so I decided that I might as well enjoy this. Soon all the members of the clan were gathered around, each cheering on for one of the two fighters. Finally, Francis gave in, hopping off the table. "I'm a tad bit tired." He stated, and a huge grin spread across Roderich's face.

"Matthew. Care to take a round?" he asked, taking Arthur's sword, and handing it to me. I smiled. He knew damn well how to cheer me up. As we both climbed up onto the table, being the only sober two out of the clan, we had a slight advantage. I nodded at him, and he mouthed 'Ready to act?' I nodded again. Most of the time, when we fought, we would only be acting. We had a routine. Each of us had tricks and actions that always surprised the others. There was only one other who surprised them more, which was Feliciano. He was vicious. The routine was more of a dance than anything. Roderich twirls out of the way; I jump to avoid the blade, etc. by the end, we were all exhausted. I shook Roderich's hand and he looked me straight into the eyes.

'Feeling better?'

'Yeah…thanks for that.'

'No problem'

People don't get it. Roderich and I are somehow connected. If we're making contact in any form, we can hear each other's thoughts. To be honest, I'm not sure why. It doesn't work for anyone else. Sometimes it's a good thing, but sometimes it makes things worse. Who knows?

~Alfred~

_I miss Mattie. _I curled up on the rug, Ludwig and Gilbert watching me. Gilbert didn't know yet, although I knew he was in the same situation. I just never knew it was this painful. It's impossible for a vampire and a werewolf to be lovers. One will end up killing the other… and vampire's scent is really strong… I don't know if I'd be able to stand that…

"Bruder, Alfred hasn't eaten anything…" Gilbert said suddenly, and I shot him a glare. "What's wrong with him?" Ludwig looked over at his brother.

"I don't know if Alfred wants you to know…"

"Who cares?" I snapped. I didn't. I just wanted to sink into my sadness. Why did love have to be so painful? Why did Mattie have to be so perfect? Why did we have to have love? It just ends up in pain either way. Love sucks. (Oh, did you catch that joke? Vampires suck blood…) I sighed, as Ludwig explained to Gilbert what my situation was. Gilbert watched me carefully after Ludwig left.

"Alfred…"

"What?"

"No need to snap at the awesome me…"

"What do you want gil?"

"I have a plan." This made me look over at him. A plan? I liked the sound of that. I could be the hero!

"What do you have in mind?"

'_i love you , too...'_

This plan might just bring me to my Mattie…


	5. Eyes Like A Full Moon

This plan might just bring me to my Mattie…

The plan was…. Dangerous to say the least. We had to kill a lot of vampires to get there. A lot. Crossing into their territory would be like suicide, but we were martyrs for our lovers. I noted how… well planned out gil had this. This only made me notice that… he's been planning it for quite a while. I reached into my pocket, where I always kept the bullet and a slice of gum. I rummaged through it, which only brought me into worry. Where was the bullet? Oh wait… Mattie took it… yeah… I felt around more until my hand felt a sharp pain. I pulled it out to find a paper cut.

"Ow…" gil watched me curiously. I took out the small piece of paper. It was small, as if torn from a notebook. I opened it up, and a few words were scrawled out in what I supposed was Mattie's handwriting.

Al-

_Call me… I'd love to catch up with you…_

_My number is (xxx)-xxx-xxxx._

_Love you, and miss you…_

_-Matt_

Yeah. This makes the plan a whole lot easier. I showed gil, and he grinned.

"Call him."

I didn't need to be told twice.

~Matthew~

I was curled up in bed, (I prefer a bed. Coffins are stuffy…) taking my journal with me. I ran my finger over the tear, hoping to god that Alfred would find my note. And call. Oh, god let him call. His voice… I closed my eyes, willing the tears that were forming to disappear. I couldn't be with him. Unless… unless I could turn him into a vampire? No… that's unheard of… a quiet knock on the door interrupted my thoughts.

"Come in…" Francis stood in the doorway, staring me down sternly. "Hi, Francis…"

"Mathieu, I know when you're upset. Please, please talk to me. I cant stand to see you this way…" he crossed the room to where I was perched on the bed and cupped my face in his hands, "I cant stand it because I love you…" he said quietly, his voice wavering slightly. I stared into his blue eyes. Blue eyes. Alfred had the most beautiful blue eyes. Like… the sky… whereas Francis' were more like… the ocean. I scooted back on the bed to make room. I trusted Francis. He was like a father in my view, whereas I was an equal in his. I guess… it doesn't make much sense. But I look up to him, and Arthur. They know what they're meant for and why they were turned. I know why I was turned. Francis. He loves me. I smiled slightly at the thought, looking at him quietly. He really was good looking. Maybe fate wanted me to be with Francis. Maybe fate got a little pissed off when Alfred and I were together, so fate had to put this curse of separation upon us. Who really knew? We sat in silence for a while, studying each other. I memorized his eyes, his nose, his chin, and his jaw line. He was beautiful, but not as beautiful as Alfred. Nothing was as beautiful as Alfred.

"Francis… I… I think I'm in love." His eyes suddenly had a look of… was it determination? He studied my eyes for a few seconds, and said quietly,

"Mais, je ne pas… le…" ('But, I am not… the…') I nodded, sad that I had to let him down. I loved him, yes. I loved him so much. He was possibly one of the biggest parts of my life. But then… when you added Alfred… hell, I missed Alfred. "Mon Cher…" Francis started again, tears building up in his eyes. _No Francis, don't cry…I hate making people cry…_ "I love you so much…" he said quietly before standing, crossing the room once more, but this time to the window. "When I first ever laid eyes on you… you were in Chicago. Walking with… some boy, hand in hand. Immediately, I was jealous. For some reason, I wanted to be that boy. I wanted to be the one that you looked so lovingly at. And for sometime, I was. And… I never really knew the effects of turning someone. I knew it would end out with at least lust. So I risked it. I had my decision made that night. I was going to take you, make you completely mine. Selfish, yes." He sighed, looking out the window, "so when I first turned you, and… we became a pair… I was ecstatic… it was the best thing that ever happened to me. But one night… you woke up screaming. Nobody could comfort you…" I remembered this. Someone was murdering me… it was Alfred. I now recognized that this was probably the night that he had turned. "I felt so useless. You were screaming some other man's name. It broke my heart to see you go to someone else…" his voice was wavering so much, I knew he was on the verge of tears. Immediately, I turned invisible, making my way next to him.

"I'm so sorry, Francis…" I whispered into his ear. He blinked, which allowed a tear to roll down his face slowly. I hugged him, from the side, and he wrapped an arm around me.

"You are the most beautiful thing living in this world," he said quietly. But he was wrong.

Alfred is the most beautiful thing living in this world. The only thing that ever was-or will be perfect. Even if he was a werewolf. Dear god, did I love him…

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><p>Please R&amp;R<p> 


	6. Searching For Our Bloodsuckers

Alfred is the most beautiful thing living in this world. The only thing that ever was-or will be perfect. Even if he was a werewolf. Dear god, did I love him…

Maybe I loved him enough to test something… has a werewolf ever been changed into a vampire? Would it be possible to do that to him? Or would I just end up killing him in the process? I wasn't as skilled as Francis or Antonio at drinking blood. They could control themselves. I usually would kill someone… Feliciano and Roderich often pulled me away from someone, attempting to keep me from killing them. That's why it was always better to have a consort. Roderich has been my consort for three years now. It was awkward at first, quite uncomfortable, really…but we both got used to it. Anyways, it was better than murdering people…

~Alfred~

I was getting tired of this. How many more flights did we have to look at? There was one to Montreal at the soonest to go, so why not book it? Because Gilbert is 'too awesome to ride Delta Airlines'. That's why. And I really want to punch him because all I want to do is see Mattie. I don't give a damn what airline Gilbert can ride! Matthew deserved to be loved and I was sure that French bastard that took his innocence was showing him the wrong kind of love! The… French kind. The only person who should be showing him that type of love is me. But… he always seemed so hesitant and innocent, so I wouldn't. I sat back, blocking out Gilbert's useless chatter. I imagined Mattie. His soft blonde hair… his deep violet eyes… he was so perfect. The most beautiful, amazing thing that would ever live… I could tell that foolish grin that I always got when I was thinking of or around Mattie had made its way onto my face. I imagined Mattie when he was making pancakes. He would dance around the kitchen, humming or singing to whatever was playing on the radio, then get all flushed when he saw you. I sighed, and Gilbert poked me in the side.

"Fine." He said, "We'll ride delta." I grinned; Mr. awesome isn't so awesome anymore, is he? :D

In the next few weeks, we practically locked ourselves into a room, preparing. We both had crosses, and wooden stakes. We knew the crosses didn't work unless it was an exorcist using it, but we had contacted one to meet us when we found Mattie and Roderich. He was a young man named Toris. I was anxious. I listened to a lot of NightCore and Panic! At The Disco music. I waited and waited until the day that we had to board the plane that would take us over the border into vampire territory, into Canada. We sat on the plane, Gilbert slept. I remained awake. I listened to music. I ate crappy airline food. I tapped a pen on my knee repeatedly. Could this ride be any longer? Finally, I reduced myself to mere daydreaming. I daydreamed about changing Mattie into a werewolf, then living forever with him by my side. I imagined Mattie's soft pale skin next to me whenever I awoke. The perfect life. Then, I imagined murdering Francis Bonnefoy. I tackled him to the ground and ripped out his throat, then drove my wooden stake through his heart as Mattie watched, thanking god for his hero to be here, saving him from that damn French pervert. Yeah, this was going to be a great trip. My daydreams were once again interrupted by the pilots voice stating that we would be landing soon. Gilbert awoke at this, clutching his small stuffed bird tightly.

"Ahh!" he yelped, sitting up. I looked at him oddly, before a cocky grin crossed my face.

"Have a bad dream, Mr. Awesome?" I stated sarcastically. He nodded, putting 'Gilbird' ('Cause he needs an awesome name, like me!') away in his carry-on. Which happened to be his only bag. I'm not completely sure how we got through security, having all the weapons we did in our bags, but hey! We got through, and we were finally in vampire territory, so we should be ready to use them. I listened as Gilbert muttered something about Utah, and looked around the clean airport. Wow. The Canadians really cared, didn't they? I inhaled deeply, and stopped. That scent… that was Mattie's scent. It smelled of vampire and maple syrup… I grinned, grabbing gilberts arm and leading him towards the scent, and it hit him as well. He stopped mid-sentence.

"But in Utah they…they… (Sniff sniff) isn't that whatshisface? Marty? Matthias? Uh…" I nearly slapped him.

"MATTHEW!" I stated loudly. He nodded. "Yes, that's his scent, lets go." I said quickly, hoping not to draw any more attention to us. It was embarrassing… I dragged him out, into the nearby woods. We stood for a second, both of us detecting his scent. But then, I smelled something else along with it.

"Lavender…" Gilbert stated, obviously smelling it along with me. His shit-eating grin crossed his face. "Roderich was with him. Damn, this just got a hell of a lot easier, burger boy…" I growled at the nickname. He would not disrespect me this way! I wouldn't allow it.

Although, he was speaking the truth. This was about to get really easy, wasn't it?

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><p>Please R&amp;R. it would mean alot to me. i really would like some comments on how this story is doing, so i have reason to continue writing...<p> 


	7. Meeting In Rememberance and Running Away

Although, he was speaking the truth. This was about to get really easy, wasn't it?

We followed the scent for a few days. They lived really far away from the airport, didn't they? That's when it hit us. More vampires. Mixed with pasta, wine, and burnt scones. Crap. Mattie was part of a clan. So it got easy, then easy, then real hard. Real hard indeed. The scent was strong, very strong. They had just been here, or even worse…

"What was that?" Gilbert asked, worry staining his voice as his eyes darted upwards. They scanned the trees. My eyes followed, and I remained silent. A tree rustled as if there were motion in it. A whisper. I perked my ear up in time to hear a small 'veh~'. They were here, weren't they? I closed my eyes, breathing in the scent again, suddenly recognizing another scent. The wine. It was… I felt myself start to turn into wolf form. This was going to get ugly wasn't it? He dropped from the tree. I growled. Francis… that damn bastard. He really liked to take the happiness from my life, didn't he?

"Ah, mon ami, I haven't seen you in a while…" he stated, purring out the French. It took me all in my power not to pounce on him in that moment. I didn't know what his strengths were… How strong he was. What was his power? I decided it would be best to turn back into human. And so I did. Gilbert's hand found a spot on my shoulder and he growled out at Francis. Francis seemed to perk even more at this. "Gilbert! Where's Antonio? We could get the whole group together, oui?" his grin was huge. Then it hit me. Bad touch trio. Oh. Shit. I turned, slapping Gilbert across the face.

"YOU'RE ONE OF THEM!" I yelled, my body shaking in anger. THEY were the ones that finally convinced Mattie to leave me. THEY were the ones who sucked the life out of me, until I met Ivan. THEY had taken the two people who meant the most to me. Mattie, and… Arthur… burnt scones…

once again, I looked up into the trees. Why did everyone I love have to be vampiristic? I watched Gilbert stand out of the corner of my eye. He had his eyes shut, and he started to explain. "Alfred… i'm not… anymore. After the bastard took Roderich…" he paused, looking down. "anyways, this is why I insisted to myself on helping you find your little maple-dude…" a small scoff was heard from above. I looked up again, searching for him, but I couldn't find him. he was most likely using his power, wasn't he?

~Matthew~

I watched them silently, only scoffing when I was called 'Maple-dude'. My name isn't THAT hard to remember, is it? Roderich sat next to me, hiding behind the leaves. I would've been in plain site, if I weren't using my power. Gilbert was talking to Alfred about why he left the bad touch trio. Where HAD Antonio gone? Nobody seemed to know anymore. Francis watched the two men, obviously enjoying the view of Alfred from behind. I rolled my eyes at this. Francis' eyes wandered into the trees and landed on me. I shook my head, knowing he wanted me to come down. I wouldn't even dare. What if he brought another bullet? My hand shot to my pocket, where the bullet had resided. I closed my eyes. I needed to get out of here before it got nasty. And Roderich would be coming along with me. I grabbed his arm and we quickly made it through the trees, out of the woods. He looked at me quizzically, but I shook my head. "no time." He nodded, and we were off again.

Nightfall came, and we were stretched out on benches at Niagara Falls. He yawned, signaling that he was tired. Personally, I agreed. It had been a long day. And night. And our nocturnal lives had just been really messed up. So we were going to wing it human style, I suppose.

At least I knew what that meant. But i'm not quite sure Roderich would like it…

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><p>Please R&amp;R. it would mean alot to me. i really would like some comments on how this story is doing, so i have reason to continue writing...<p> 


	8. Hidden Pasts and Broken Hearts

At least I knew what that meant. But I'm not quite sure Roderich would like it…

"Where are we going?" he asked, following me into the casino on the American side. He was DEFINITELY not accustomed to… all this. I smiled sweetly at the lady at the desk, asking for an open room. She nodded, leading us to the room, which happily had a bed and a pullout. Otherwise, hell, awkward! Roderich looked very nervous the entire time, as if someone was going to jump out at him like a ninja. I smiled, nearly knowing what he was thinking.

"We're to close to the border for an attack. Plus, did you see all those people? If a werewolf came, it would be revealing its entire race to them." I stated, calming Roderich down a bit. He sat down on the bed awkwardly, and I could see his fingers moving ever so slightly, playing an invisible piano. This is one of the things I admired about him. He had a passion for his music that was so strong, he breathed it. His whole life was made of music. I was sure he had a life story, we all did, but I had never heard it. I decided to try to coax him into telling me. And I've never been good at coaxing. So I went with the simple approach.

"Roderich?"

"Ja?"

"I was wondering… about what your life was like… pre-vampirism?" he nodded, his fingers continuing what I supposed to be a nocturne. He seemed to be thinking. Possibly trying to remember. It's odd, how when a vampire changes, it erases most of their memory until they see someone, or something that sparks it. He smiled sadly, the nocturne slowing as he began to speak.

"I lived in Austria. My mother and father were very well off, but they decided to immigrate into the United States. I wasn't very happy about this, so when we arrived, I ran off. They did not like the thought of me continuing with my music, but I had insisted. It wasn't like I could take a piano with me, but I took my violin. I managed to get far away from them. I stayed in New York, they moved west. They thought they would be able to find gold, I suppose. I played in the street for food and money, earning just enough to get by, but I did… right when I hit around my human age now, I can't really remember it to be honest, the curse took place." I knew about the curse. About a quarter of the vampires in our world were cursed into vampirism, and not changed. They most likely were dying at birth, and the nurse was a vampire, casting the curse on the tiny baby, creating on of their own kind. Roderich continued, "It was terrifying. I was constantly hungry, but nothing satisfied me. I got extremely violent at times. Then I went on my first spree." His nocturne slowed even more. "Thirty-four people. Dead. I killed them, Matthew. I killed thirty-three extra innocent lives than I should have." A translucent tear rolled down his cheek. I had an urge to hug him and be motherly. Damn my instincts. I didn't do anything though, I remained seated. "A few days later, I was out, by a bridge. There were two boys there. One my age and one that looked older. I found out that he was actually younger. The older one was Gilbert. I knew from the moment that I saw him that I was in love. Deep, deep, love. We got to know each other, but then… the final transformation happened, right after he gave me…" he stopped, his hand moving into his pocket and pulling out an iron cross. "He gave me it as a promise. A promise that he would forever love me. That he would never forget me and work his whole life to be with me. But I knew we would be separated. I couldn't live with a human. I would end up killing him. I didn't want to risk it. And so I found Francis. He helped me through it. The whole clan was started by the two of us…he used his strange ability to… charm… people into it, and Feliciano just seemed to cling to me. Then Francis… he told me one day that he thought he was truly in love. I supposed he meant with Arthur, but it was actually you. I guess, that's when you came in. and you really know the story from there…" he was playing with the cross, turning it over in his hands, and tracing the outline with his fingers. I sighed. We remained silent for what felt like years, and he said quietly, "Lets get some rest…" I nodded. It was already 11:30, and we had quite the day tomorrow…

~Alfred~

Damn him. Damn him. Hate. Hate him. Damn. Hell. Go to hell. Damn him. Hate. Asshole. Damn. Hell. Hate, hate, hate. Trapped. Alone. Eternity alone. Damn him. Die. Die, die, and die. Hell. Go.

That was my thought stream as I fought the man who took away my best friend, AND my true love. I hated Francis Bonnefoy with every piece of my life. He DESERVED to die. He deserved it for making me suffer. I suffered. For years, I was alone. I didn't do anything to fucking deserve it! I WAS ALWAYS DOING GOOD! Why? Why me? Fuck him. I lunged at him again, already memorizing his line of attacks and retreats. He had practiced this, hadn't he? Bastard. He knew this day would come! I waited. His next attack. I reached into my coat pocket, where my gun had found itself. My teeth grinded together as I prepared it for him. He lunged. I shot. He fell backwards. I yelled.

"YOU DESERVE IT! YOU TOOK MATTIE'S LIFE AWAY!" he stood, grinning. Shit. I missed his heart. His laugh. I hated that fucking laugh! He was laughing like he was drunk. He probably was drunk.

"Onhonohonhon, mon ami… you think his life was 'taken'? He still has a soul you know. Hmm… where is he?" he looked up into the trees, and the simile on his face fell. He scanned the trees again and again, and I saw a small tan boy looking around up there as well. He looked like Lovino…

"Veh~ he's gone. So is Mr. Roderich…" the boy pouted, before dropping to the ground. I heard Gilbert swear. I closed my eyes, and sighed.

"Francis. I am going to kill you. But first, I want to find Mattie." Arthur looked at me oddly. His green eyes darted from me to Francis to me again. I held out my hand for Francis to shake but he didn't. Instead, he snickered, and shook his hand.

"I'll never make an agreement with a mutt." He stated. That's when I pounced.

Nobody. Ever. Calls. Me. a. mutt. Especially not a leech! Damn leech. He better be ready to die.

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><p>Please R&amp;R. it would mean alot to me. i really would like some comments on how this story is doing, so i have reason to continue writing...<p> 


	9. The Exorcism

Nobody. Ever. Calls. Me. a. mutt. Especially not a leech! Damn leech. He better be ready to die.

To die a very painful death. I pulled out the stake and it was on. We were neck and neck. He was attempting to grab me. His eyes flashing red, showing that he would love to kill me on the spot. I'm sure I had something along those lines in me somewhere. I just didn't know where. I swipe there, a jab there. A grab, a kick. A punch, an elbow. How long was this going to go on? Gilbert had run off, I could tell he was searching for the scent. The Italian and Arthur watched intently, both watching our faces for a hint of defeat. I had glanced at Arthur, and Francis took this as an advantage, knocking me to the ground and hovering me. Oh. Shit. The stake fell out of my hand and had resided itself a few inches away from me. Francis grinned at me from his perch. Well, sort of perch. He was almost lying on me… "I didn't take his life. I just took his love interest." He said to me, grinning in my face. That bastard. He didn't notice me grab the stake, slowly, my fingers curling around it. I kneed him in the stomach as a distraction, and as he curled up, I drove the stake into him. Past the ribs, straight into his chest. _Remember, al, its right near the middle. _His gasps were suddenly joined by a shrill shriek. His heart. It let out it's own screams, wanting to be let out of the misery of being pierced. I twisted the stake, turning us over so I could watch his pain. Once I was sure he was dead, I stood, facing the other two vampires, with a huge grin on my face. "Who's next?" the Italian was suddenly on his knees, begging for me not to hurt him, and Arthur was on his knees next to Francis, muttering something, which sounded like a spell. What the hell?

~Arthur~

Damn it! Why wasn't he coming back? I used the strongest spell I could… maybe it doesn't work on vampires? Damn! All my hard work! How could Alfred to that to him? I think… I actually loved Francis Bonnefoy… and my former best friend just murdered him for Matthew Williams. Knowing Alfred, he made plans with an exorcist. Francis would want Matthew to stay vampire. So Matthew will be. I'll make sure of it, or die trying.

~Gilbert~

MONTREAL! Shit, maple-face! Why couldn't you be here in the first place? Save us the time? Hey, at least the exorcist is here. I tracked them to a casino, before calling said exorcist. He was there in less than ten minutes, rubbing his eyes slightly, obviously wondering why an albino was waiting for him.

"A-Alfred Jones?" I shook my head.

"Gilbert Beilschmidt." He nodded.

"you have vampires?" I told him that there were two, in the casino, nobody else knew. He nodded, and I lead him up to their room, quietly picking the lock, and leading him in. Matthew was sleeping quietly on the sofa, and Toris nodded, leaning over Matthew, and taking holy water from the bag that was slung over his shoulder. He started to say something and Matthew started to move. It looked painful. His face glowed with… who knows? Toris continued to whisper words while sprinkling holy water on Matthew. It looked like it hurt, the was Matthew was moving, as if trying to shake pain. The odd thing was that Matthew remained asleep. Toris then took a wooden cross, and held it to Matthew's chest, causing a bright beam to come up around them, and then fade away. Toris stood up straight, placing the cross into a bag and sealing it. Matthew's face turned from its bright pale to a soft peach. Matthew Williams was once more a human. Now it was time to change Roderich. We walked quietly into the room to see him. he looked so perfect. He was curled into the fetal position, his one hair curl- different than Matthew's and Lovino's and little Italian dude's- was sticking out, begging to be pulled. I guess that would have to wait until he couldn't kill me on the spot… I watched as the ritual started over, Toris quietly chanting his spell and sprinkling his holy water. I had to turn around from the scene. It looked too painful on him for me to bear. He was beautiful though. Even in this state. I wanted to hold him. comfort him. stop the pain. But I knew that this was better. This way, we could be together. Toris continued for much longer on Roderich than on Matthew. I supposed this was due to the fact that Roderich had been a vampire longer. Toris finally pulled out his cross, pressing it into Roderich's chest. When the light finally disappeared, I sighed in relief. I had my lover back.

~Matthew~

something was…different when I woke up. My stomach growled eagerly, as if I hadn't fed in days, and I had fed yesterday. My skin was peach and I was feeling undoubtedly… Human. It was… odd. Suddenly I heard a slight yelp from the other room. I sat up, probably to fast, because there was a sudden dizziness. I tiredly swung my feet over to stand firmly on the floor, the plush carpet. I slowly made my way into the room to find a very human-looking Roderich, who was awake, and a sleeping Gilbert. I blinked twice before Gilbert woke, reaching over and grabbing Roderich, pulling him close like a lover. Well, as a lover I suppose. Who really knew what this situation was giving us? The one thing that struck me was that Roderich struggled getting away from Gilbert. we were usually much stronger… than werewolves and than… _humans._

Oh, maple. I pray to the god that he didn't hire an exorcist…

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><p>I feel like a dork. I'm spending majority of my February break on fan fiction. I AM OFFICIALLY A FANGIRL, AND SWOLLEN WITH PRIDE!<p>

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><p>Please R&amp;R. it would mean alot to me. i really would like some comments on how this story is doing, so i have reason to continue writing...<p> 


	10. Bring Me Back To Bitter Life

Oh, maple. I pray to the god that he didn't hire an exorcist…

Gilbert sat up and looked at me, his grin huge. "Good morning!" he said, his voice singing out the last word. I rolled my eyes, walking out. This was not good. I heard the two of them talking quietly, and I sat there, trying to think of any other reasonable explanation. I was asleep? Or he hired an exorcist… I sighed, continuing to think. _I'm dreaming. I know I am. I have to be. Please? Please let me be sleeping? _I spotted a plastic bag with a wooden cross in it on the bedside table. Maple. He hired an exorcist. A line of swearwords crossed through my head at that moment. Mostly in French. Some English thrown in there, but mostly French. I didn't know what to do. At all. I felt like shit. My phone rang, an unknown number popping up on the screen.

"Allo?" I answered, my Canadian accent heavy, as it usually was when I was tired.

"MATTIE!" my name was nearly screamed into my ear. "OPEN THE DOOR!" He was at the door? What? "Its me, Alfred…" he added. No duh. I got up and tiredly opened the door, only to get tackle-glomped.

"Eh…"

"MATTIE! YOU'RE HUMAN!"

"SHIT! BLOODY GIT! YOU GOT A BLOODY EXORCIST IN HERE?" Arthur screamed from behind him. a small 'veh~' was also heard, signaling Feliciano's presence. Wait… Feli knew how to turn humans back into vampires after the exorcism… thank maple god…

~Alfred~

he seemed really pissed when I told him he was human. Shit. He wanted to be a vampire? Hell, I didn't want to be a werewolf so he shouldn't want to be a vampire! What's wrong with him? I read those twilight books! They know that they're monsters… that's what they think, right? What if I'm wrong? What if he actually wants to be a vampire and I took that away from him? shit. Man, I fucked up, didn't I? I really, really fucked this one up… I heard a slight movement from the other room, I perked up, smelling Gilbert, and Toris. So Gilbert brought Toris here and changed them. Without even thinking it fucking over! Damn it… I sighed, getting off my adorable Mattie. He looked so cute. His wavy hair falling around him, crowning him like a prince. His violet eyes wide and panicky. His mouth slightly open from shock. Suddenly I found myself pressed against the door, a very angry Englishman in my face.

"YOU GIT! YOU KILL OUR LEADER, THEN YOU CHANGE TWO MORE OF US!" he yelled, and I heard a sudden gasp.

"h-he killed Francis?" my Mattie's voice wavered, showing that he was on the verge of tears. _Shit, don't cry. Please don't cry. Please, oh please…_ I could tell that my internal begging wasn't working, as the little Italian kid hugged Mattie close, wiping away tears and muttering about how pasta would make everything better. I suddenly felt guilty. What if… what if Mattie really did love Francis? What if I ruined it for him? what if I was so selfish that I didn't take in his side of the entire plan. I knew I could turn this all on Gilbert, but at the same time I couldn't. I had gone along with it. I was the fault in all of this. I was the reason for the two most important people in my life's suffering. Crap.

How do you undo an exorcism? And a murder? If I had the answers, it would be wonderful….

I watched as Mattie talked to the little Italian boy, whispering, and the Italian boy nodded continuously, adding an occasional 'veh~'. What was with him and saying that? And why didn't I know his name yet? Oh, so many questions, sir. I noticed the boy pointing at a small bag with a wooden cross inside it. Mattie nodded. What the hell was going on?

~Matthew~

When Feliciano told me that the cross contained my curse, I immediately felt relieved. Its odd. The feeling of being human. You can't control anything. My emotions were messed up, I was starving, and well, I couldn't be in command of my personal effects. It was weird, and horrid, really. To be that needy. To be so helpless. To feel fear, fear of most of the people in the very room. I had to get the curse back before Alfred or Gilbert bit me. I couldn't be a werewolf. I just couldn't. Something drew me in to the members of the clan, but they weren't as amazing as they would be when I was a vampire. When you're a human, you don't use every bit of ability your senses have. But, as a vampire, you use all of the capability you have. You put every smidgen of life you have into everything. Its what makes vampires as a result much more outgoing than humans. What I found entertaining was the views of people. They didn't know that vampires were sitting right next to them in class, dancing with them in clubs, serving them in cafes and ice cream shops. Driving their limos, acting on their televisions. They've created us to be monsters. To be killers. To be feared. They think we have no souls. We have more soul than they do. They think that we are driven crazy. Only when we've gone to long alone or thirsty. They think that we do not care for other species. But we do. Majority of the animal shelters in the world are run by vampires. This is why I find the human race repulsive. They haven't respect for even their own race. So I was thrilled that Feli was ready to bring my curse back. But I would have to be sure that Gilbert and Alfred were gone. It wouldn't work otherwise. I'm almost sure that Arthur read my mind when I thought this, for he grabbed Alfred and hissed at him to let us be for a while and to take his 'odd friend' with him. Alfred agreed but I knew it was going to take a while to persuade Gilbert. Arthur and Alfred worked on it as Feliciano and I got Roderich away from them. I told Roderich about Francis and he froze.

"Francis is dead?" he asked quietly, his voice wavering. Could tell he didn't believe either of us, his eyes darting back and forth between us. We both nodded and he looked down, I could tell it was hard on him; hell it was hard on all of us. We all needed Francis for a certain reason each, but it was all different. Either way, the death was going to affect all of us more than we thought. It was going to be painful. Even as a human, I could tell. I watched as Alfred dragged Gilbert out, who was yelling about it being 'totally unawesome!'

Feliciano grabbed my cross, suddenly becoming very serious. More serious than any of us thought it was possible for him to become. He closed his eyes, and none of us dared to speak. He opened the bag, and we all leaned in to get a better look at the cross. It had a small black gem in the center, which seemed to almost have smoke in it. He opened his eyes, grabbing my wrist. I allowed him to do so, prepared for anything that might happen. He looked over at Arthur who nodded, coming over, leaving Roderich to watch intently. Arthur recited a small spell, and Feliciano's wrist was suddenly covered in markings. It was hieroglyphics to me, I didn't understand it. He pressed the cross, the gem, onto my wrist, where my veins were visible, the blood looked like a sky blue, through my skin. He placed his wrist on the other side, and Arthur continued to chant his small spell. Suddenly a burst of pain ran through me, and Feliciano took the cross and his wrist away. The gem on the cross turned to a clear color, sparkling like a diamond. Arthur had me sit down, Feliciano saying something to him, but I couldn't hear it. All I heard was my own heartbeat. The blood pounding in my ears loudly. Bud-dump. Bud-dump. Bud-dump. My vision flooded with black, red speckles dotting it. All I could see was Arthur's figure leaning towards me, and I felt a light pain in my neck, my jugular vein. It quickly went numb, along with my entire body. It was an odd feeling but… I remembered it from… somewhere. I suddenly found myself sitting on a wooden bench, looking out onto a black pond. Someone warm had their arm around me, and was humming lightly. I looked up and saw Francis.

"Mon amour, do not worry. I'm sending you back. And I promise to do my best to be back as well…" he kissed me lightly on the forehead, and then stood. I reached out to him, doing my best to call out, but my voice didn't come. I felt myself tearing up; my legs wouldn't move to follow him down the path that he had begun to walk down. He looked like an angel, although dressed in his usual dress. In this black world that I found myself, he was bright. He was the light that I wanted so badly to go to, yet I couldn't. I was stuck in the darkness. A sob shook throughout my body, and I found myself curled up on the bench. I wanted so badly to be in the presence of someone, anyone. I closed my eyes, allowing myself to drift to a dreamless, anxious, and vacant sleep.

When I opened my eyes, I was peering into a pair of bright green eyes, and hearing a heavy British accent that I knew all to well.

"He's awake."

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><p>So, i have requested a certain beta... hopefully said beta will agree. this story needs alot of work, je sais, je sais!<p>

anyways... R&R please!

all reviewers get cookies and italian kisses!

italy: *noms cookie, kisses author*

author: *blushes*


	11. Author's Note Discontinueation

okay. so sorry, if you like this story but due to lack of reviews, im dis-continuing it. IF i get some more reviews, begging for it back, i may go back on that decision, but at the moment, the story is dead. sorry.

i still love you...


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